Goth face

Getting back into it

Things aren’t going too badly these days. I’m getting back into the groove of things and Toby’s training is coming along nicely too (which frees me up to get more work done). He’s getting so big too!! He’s quite the little handful but he’s getting a bit better with biting and housetraining… still a long way to go though!! I know that I’m going to worry about him a bit while I’m in Mexico. We’re boarding him in Winnipeg until we get back. I know he’ll be fine and the people that I’ve spoken to there sounded very friendly. We would have kept him up here and had a friend feed him and take him out but he needs to get his shots. So he’s going to get used to flying young!

As for me, I’ve been thinking that I’m going to start focusing my awareness outward. I’ve been so focused inwardly on my spiritual growth and everything that I’ve shut out the rest of the world to a certain extent. I’m realizing now that I’m not living to the fullest extent if I’m not experiencing the world around me. I think that’s also why I’ve been craving travel for a few weeks now. Of course that doesn’t mean that I’m going to stop my inner growth. I’m just going to try and balance the inner and outward more. Not sure exactly how I’m going to do this yet, but I’ll figure it out. Slowly but surely.

I got quite a bit of work accomplished a couple of nights ago. Put up all my artwork and some pictures that I hadn't hung yet. It's really looking great around here but then again I'm biased since most of the artwork is either my own or stuff I've bought. It makes me happy to see my own art on the walls. One of B's friends actually told me to stop bragging other night when I said there was one in the bedroom they could take a look at if they wanted. *sigh* No wonder so many artists don't share their work! What's wrong with being proud of your work? I do like sharing my art with other people. It's something that I'm actually decent at and it makes me feel good to know that other people enjoy it too. So I'm going to keep painting and dammit I'm going to keep "bragging" too!

In other news, yesterday someone told us that there’d been a polar bear out in the baseball diamond just across the road from us! I’m kind of bummed that I didn’t get to see but glad that it didn’t come over when Toby was outside! I’d be mortified if he got eaten by a polar bear! I’ve been keeping an eye out for them for the past week or so since there have been a few sightings near town. I use the binoculars we own and scan out across what I can see of the land from my bedroom window. My view is pretty limited but maybe I’ll get lucky one of these days. Just as long as it’s at a distance I’m cool… I do not want to be polar bear dinner!
  • Current Mood: artistic artistic
Toby could ACTUALLY get eaten by a polar bear??!! Eeek! I guess I assumed they wouldn't come into the more populated areas like your town! That's scary.

I can't believe one of B's friends actually said that to you. What was the reaction to that comment? I mean I could see some kinda weird comment if you were dancing around singing "My art is better than your art, na na na na boo boo" or something (now visualizing Kalee doing this...heehee) but just offering to show them what you had done? please! I wish I felt more confident about my own work... its still hard just to show people and wait for their reaction.

So what do you mean when you say inner growth as opposed to outer growth? Like have you been doing lots of meditating and now you want to do more ritual? I'd love to hear more about what kind of stuff you're working on - inner or outer. I know one of my big areas for 'spiritual self-improvement' right now falls into the 'sharing' category. I tend to keep things to myself, so i'm trying to work on that a bit - hence some of my filtering. ;) I'm also trying to do some more self-reflective work... like my symbol set stuff. We're always a work in progress it seems. ;)

I didn't say anything to B's friend about the "bragging" comment. I just let it slide. All I'd done was say that there was another painting in the bedroom if they wanted to have a look at it so I think he was just being a jerk.

As for inner growth vs outer growth, I've just been focusing on reading and research and inner thought for the past few years, focusing on myself and what I'm feeling and what I'm looking for. I don't tend to share much with others either and I haven't really done much for other people since I tend to keep to myself. So I'm going to keep up with the reading and such but I'm going to try and be a smidgen more active. I'm going to definitely start doing some rituals but also I want to start doing things like inviting people over for supper or movies or something like that to build community and maybe make people feel good. I'm not sure exactly what else I'll do but I want to start sharing and helping others out a bit. It's new ground for me so other than rituals I'm really not sure what direction I'm going to go in! LoL