Goth face

ramblings

I know that the person I'm about to write about reads this...and please forgive me for not saying this to you in person, but I just don't know how.

I got a bad feeling that night... it came suddenly and lasted a short time and then was gone again. Jealousy? Perhaps. My own subconscious hating my own loneliness. Maybe. But it was there, it was strong and it was real. It must have been something, because I shut myself off to these kind of "feelings" so many years ago.

And then there's her... one moment a friendship getting closer and stronger, even sometimes to the point where it caused another to feel somewhat left out...then suddenly a new wind sweeps through and she's gone. She says she's not, but I know it's true. I know there are reasons...there always are. But I'm worried for her. This talk of demons and curses is not right... this sudden surge of emotions, this strong love so quickly, so intense... something feels off... and yet, I want her to be happy. I want her to feel loved like never before, but something tells me this isn't right. Like a piece of the puzzle doesn't quite fit. I want to believe I'm just making it up, that it's all in my head...but something nags at me... I see her changing. Things that once we talked about, that she felt so strongly about, are no longer good enough. Things that used to matter ... seem to matter less... most of all, I see her changing with the wind, and I fear it's an ill wind indeed.

Tread carefully my friend, I'd hate to see the wind take you so far from your home, from yourself, that you can no longer find the way back. And me, I will try to be happy for you, as I've been in your shoes, but not everyone needs a break from the wind for a while. Perhaps a breeze will blow my way soon.

I'm sorry.
  • Current Mood: distressed distressed
Just remember that your friends are always your friends...even when the euphoria of something new and wonderful seems to have stolen them away.

Don't fret too much. I know what you're talking about and who...she hasn't forgotten you.

Just try to be patient as she opens this new chapter of her life...after all, you are already a character in the novel.
If that were only true... unfortunately I've lost a few good friends over the years because of one thing or another. Sometimes they've been "stolen away" as you say, other times we've drifted apart...

I'm not under the impression that I've been forgotten. A secondary character in the story, perhaps, but not forgotten. I am simply concerned about what I'm seeing... but I guess it's probably none of my business.

I have been alone before in my life and I will probably be alone again before the end. It is the way of things in my life.

The things I said needed to be said because I needed them off my chest.

Thank you for trying help.
I don't know what to say.

But I will try, soon, to say something.

I'm sorry too.